We Went to London, Part 1

 

After months of improvising a nonsensical "Jolly Old London Town" song whenever we were waiting for public transit ("Jolly Old London Town, there's peas and George in London Town"), Zack and I took off for London in August.*

* "It wasn't nonsensical," Zack maintains. "It was edgy comedy!"

I thought we were staying across the street from the British Museum, but we actually stayed on the same block as the British Museum. If our room had been on the opposite side of the hall, we would have had views of the museum's courtyard. I couldn't get over the crassness of my life as I thought about everything I was doing within 1,000 feet of the Rosetta stone: shaving my legs, eating a ball of mozzarella out of a tiny plastic bag (thanks, Sainsbury's, love you), goosing my boyfriend, etc.

We spent our first day walking ourselves silly to keep jet lag at bay. (Thanks for that hot tip, Rick Steves!) We immediately learned a vital life-truth: London is beautiful, America is ugly, Rule Brittania. Get a look at some of these stunners:

I casually glanced to my left and saw THIS HOUSE FROM SENSE AND SENSIBILITY down the street.

We tried to reenact the scene in which it appears:

Sense & Sensibility reenactment, PART 1/2

A video posted by Amelia (@marlojunior) on Aug 8, 2014 at 3:26pm PDT

Sense & Sensibility reenactment, PART 2/2

A video posted by Amelia (@marlojunior) on Aug 8, 2014 at 3:27pm PDT

A world without open container laws is still a world I cannot comprehend.

What is franked mail? I've been meaning to look it up.

 

"Here's a statue of a dead white guy," I explained to my parents as I showed them vacation photos. 

This monument was designed as if the women of World War II can pick up their hats and coats and resume work at any moment.

Tourists yanked on the horses of the Horse Guard Parade anyway. I didn't see a bite or a kick, but I did see a sense of resigned despair in the guard's eye.

This is the last picture we took on the good camera before we went out for the evening, which started with Indian food at Chutney's in Euston.  Then we played nine-ball in a snooker hall where "Ring of Fire" played on the jukebox SIX TIMES IN A ROW, which made us consider canceling vacation. Oh, and somewhere in there I got carded really intensely at a bar, because I look 18? I'll never let that go.